Things I Already Know

You know, so many of people have told me the same thing. “Doug you just need to accept things they way they are.” “The employee doesn’t dictate the rules.” It strikes me that most people that see things this way are very unhappy in what they do in life. My father said that to me for years, he was miserable at his job, I don’t blame him for leaving when he did. This is why people hang themselves in their front yard, or blow their own heads off, because they are unhappy and bored of the mundane, they don’t feel like they are making the kind of difference in the world that they want to, and they are sick and tired of it. Or they feel like some ones Servant/Bitch, now I have accepted to a certain extent that I seem to be one of the few people that gets this, and that puts me in a minority, even more so because I don’t seem to be able to let it go. I think it is one of the greater evils that human beings have to endure. That may sound severe but that is the way I feel about it, I don’t think anyone should have to feel shallow or useless, or even like they have their hands tied all the time. Some of the biggest companies in the world were started by people that feel exactly the same way I do about this so it pays off eventually. As far as this job went, the focus was not on education at all. The focus is about putting asses in the seats so the school makes money. All they need us there for is entertainment, to keep kids happy and maybe they will learn a little English out of it if they are lucky. I was asked to change my student’s grades for my last class, just flat out change the grades to grades that the students didn’t deserve, apparently they have a ratio of letter grades and my class didn’t meet that ratio. So now a bunch of students are going to pass that don’t deserve to and some other teacher is going to have a very hard time with them. It’s not my fault, I did everything I was expected to do with that class and more, if the students decide not to pay attention it’s no skin off my neck.
As far as doing what this employer wanted … I would like to believe I did but it wouldn’t have mattered because an example needed to be made to the foreign staff, I was statistically the lowest performer at the time, so regardless of my current numbers I was done well before I ever really started. You could say I didn’t have a chance when I stepped off the plane, again I am the least attractive by far and easily one of the more serious when it comes to this job so I am not popular with the staff. There is a lot more that went into my departure than sheer numbers, the people here are some of the most shallow I have ever seen when it comes to looks and attitude.
As far as having the right attitude when I was little … I guess I just didn’t know any better back then. The only thing I knew about a working environment was my grandparents, I had no real idea what my Dad’s job was like other than he hated it, my mother didn’t really work, and frankly I knew what Grandma and Grandpa wanted in an employee, and honestly I guess I thought they would get a kick out of the three piece suit. Honestly I doubt I was a very good employee, and I damn sure didn’t do more than was expected of me for 5 bucks a week, even back then it wasn’t much money. I just wanted to be able to see a movie once a week, for that I was willing to take out some trash. In fact I even remember asking Grandma for my salary early in 1991 to go see “Ninja turtles 2 Secret of the Ooze” because mom and dad had taken us to the wrong theatre and I decided to use my 5 bucks on video games instead. I was able to save up and buy my first multi speed bike, a 12 speed I believe, worst bike I have ever owned, but it was mine lock stock and barrel. So even my attitude about work was not the best back then, I mean what was a kid like me gonna get paid for taking out the trash in the morning, not much.
Guys I have to be happy in what I do, or I just can’t do it. I have tried my best to change this, but I don’t think it’s going to. Kevin for example isn’t happy, the only reason he endures it is because of Kat, admirable I will admit. Perhaps if I had a family or even a girlfriend life would be worth enduring. Alas, this is not a reality for me, at least not yet. I very much tried to do what this Employer expected of me. I simply didn’t have a chance once I was told I had a month, the decision had been made. Are there teachers at the school that are as bad as me? Of course, most people that teach there really don’t seem to care much about education, I do. Any of the other teachers the put education of financial growth are not appreciated.
I am having the interview tomorrow rather than last Thursday, the company has been very hard to contact even though I find that they are just right down the road from us. I am hoping to just work part time for right now and perhaps sign up for a year contract this next time around, otherwise I may not be coming home as planned. There is a small possibility of a warrant being out for my arrest so I want to take care of that before I come home for sure.
I only have one class because I co teach that class with someone else. I have an assistant, she has a degree in teaching English, even though her English isn’t very good it is about as good as can be expected from a Chinese English education. They want me to continue with this class because the students like me, they were sad to hear about me going and requested that I stay on as one of their teachers. I have also mentioned that I would be happy to teach all the classes I can on the weekend or sub whatever classes need subbed, our DOS (Director Of Studies) Peter isn’t happy about how this all went down. I was assured that everything would be alright, I made a very expensive purchase for myself and things have been far from alright. I think if I can work something out with this job I will take it, but I want to be assured about certain things first. I will also have to do a demo class for them. If I have to sign a year contract, you guys will see Tom before you see me; in fact it may be several years before you guys see me. You may have to visit China if you really wish to see me. I think I have prolly offended enough people; I’d rather not discuss this type of thing anymore. I know what all you guys think and I don’t agree, as usual, so let’s leave it at that.